SFP 43 – Episode 43: Beyond Goals, Beyond Habits: 5 Questions for your Reflections
Simply Focus Podcast – Episode #43
Hosted by: Elfie Czerny & Dominik Godat | Intro: Bibiana Czerny & Ken Brooks | Music: www.bensound.com
SFP 43 - Episode 43: Beyond Goals, Beyond Habits: 5 Questions for your Reflections
“I think it can be fun and a great idea to set goals. And I am even more convinced that it is making a huge difference to reflect on what differences those goals make for you, for others, for your relationships, and things like that, in a way that really shows the picture of a preferred future.”
“What I really love about exploring the preferred future is, that for me, it also invites not to make a plan so much and not to think of creating habits to achieve those goals, but much more to think of fun things to do in order to keep going, fun things to do that energize my preferred future, that give a boost towards my preferred future.”
“To stay curious, to stay open for our own lives, for what is working for us right now, this is something that I feel makes a huge difference. And when I create a habit it often becomes about repeating this habit and it’s not about staying curious anymore.”
Elfie Czerny“What we realize when we think about our preferred future and about the whole picture, how that might look like, that compared to goals it much more fits to the idea of change is happening all the time. Because a goal is really fix and when the world changes those goals usually stay fix, for a while at least. And with the preferred future it’s so interesting to see what differences we might notice and how this might even change when things change, so it’s a much more fluid picture.”
“The crazy three is a fun way to do, of discovering small next steps or signs of progress. We just come up with 3 little things that we want to do today that hopefully will contribute to our preferred future. That can be very, very small or little bit bigger, just things that you would love to do, maybe crazy things that you want to try out. And just see what happens. And tomorrow you have a new chance for new crazy threes.”
Dominik GodatShow Notes
In today’s episode, we talk about
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our new voice on our podcast and how we got to know Ken Brooks
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what fascinates Elfie with reflections and how she regularly takes the time to reflect in a Solution Focused way
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joyful and supportive ways to reflect (y)our past and future life in this ever changing world
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different ways of reflecting that fit to different people
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beyond goals or the differences between Solution Focused reflections and other reflections
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the crazy three – first little steps towards your preferred future
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beyond habits or staying curious for our own lives and for what is working for us right now
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the importance of interactional aspects in reflections
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valuing the past and what worked so far
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5 questions for your reflections that we used to reflect our 2018 and 2019:
- What would you like to have continue?
- What effects, impact, differences do you hope your actions will make in 2019?
Here you might want to consider different areas of life, e.g. wellbeing – joy, ease & happiness – relationships – finances – career – impact you want to make in the world,… and to also further explore your answers to this question with the following questions: Who would notice that? How might they react? What would they see you doing? What would you see them doing? How would you interact differently? - How will you notice in the your everyday life that your preferred future is unfolding?
- And how might that be useful for your further progress?
- How will you celebrate even your small steps and successes?
With whom will you celebrate? How might this person react to that? What differences might celebrating your success make in your relationship with this person? What differences might celebrating your successes make for your interactions with other people?
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The challenge of the week: „Think of your latest reflection(s) – What worked well there? What differences did this reflection make for you and for others? And what of that might be useful in your future?
Resources
- In episode #6 Solution Focused Listening we talk about Nancy Kline’s ‘Time to Think’ and share how we do ‘thinking rounds’.
- In episode #26 we celebrate 6 months Simply Focus podcast with “That reminds me of the following story” and also had the joy and honor to talk with Hannes Couvreur, the founder of this inspiring reflection method.
- Go to ‘That Reminds Me of The Following Story‘ to find out more about how to enrich and empower the wisdom of people, communities and organisations.
Join the conversation
Friendpower is stronger than willpower. So, let’s inspire each other! Share your ideas and thoughts on what inspired you about our conversation and what differences this makes for you in your everyday life. Share as much detail as possible. Your story might be the one making a vital difference for someone else. Your thoughts and ideas matter and might encourage others to keep on going their SF journey. Share this podcast episode with your friends, clients or colleagues who you think might be inspired by this conversation. It could give them some practical ideas on how to apply Solution Focus in their daily life.
Thank you!
Thank you for listening to our podcast. You are awesome! That you listen to our podcast makes a huge difference for us. Please let us know and get in touch with us: Comment below or send us a message and tell us what difference our podcast series makes for you. And please share our podcast with others that might benefit from it and give us an honest rating at iTunes. Your ratings and reviews really help and we read each and every single one. You really support our show with that as this will make it more likely that other people will find the SIMPLY FOCUS podcast and benefit.
Listen to more Simply Focus Podcast episodes:

SFP 41 – Solution Focus is an Evidence-Based Intervention: The Impact of Research for Solution Focus with Johnny S. Kim

SFP 38 – Exceptional Sessions: Animal-Assisted Solution Focused Brief Therapy & More with Teri Pichot

SFP 32 – Small steps count: A conversation about SF parenting, SF in Japan and more with Keiko Yoneyama

SFP 27 – Hope in Action: A Conversation with Heather Fiske about Solution Focused Suicide Prevention

SFP 26 – Celebrating Half a Year SIMPLY FOCUS Podcast with That Reminds Me Of The Following Story by Hannes Couvreur

SFP 23 – What directions do you choose in your conversations? – A face-to-face dialogue with Dr. Peter de Jong
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